- That positive outlook: The other day I got a fortune cookie which said: Your happiness is entertwined with your outlook on life. For the first time in my life, that sentiment did not piss me off. In the past, it always did because it blithely dismisses the fact that if you don’t have much power over your own life, your happiness is mostly entertwined with other people’s outlook on your life, and what they think it’s worth, and whether you’re someone they mind stepping on ... READ MORE
Psychology
- Non-survivor privilege and silence: While it shouldn’t be a privilege to escape abuse in this life, there are trappings of privilege for those who have been so lucky. I know it’s an odd thing to say, and it’s a realization I’ve been slowly moving toward since childhood, but it works like this: Once you survive abuse or violation, you have a knowledge of the human capacity for nastiness that others around you don’t share. It is your duty to keep them blissfully ignorant at the expense ... READ MORE
- The entitlement of the passive-aggressive do-gooder: “Won’t somebody please think of the children???” - The preacher’s wife on the Simpsons I recently made the mistake of engaging in a business transaction with a Christian who believes that, because s/he is a Christian everything s/he does is unquestionably the Lord’s work, s/he cannot possibly have done me wrong. It’s not the first time this has happened to me, and sadly, it caused me to revisit my tolerance policy and decide that, until things in the US change, I will ... READ MORE
- Niceness privilege: Being nice should mean being genuinely kind, caring and empathetic. But in reality, the standard’s much lower. Just saying “please” and “thank you”, tucking your shirt in and failing to commit violent crimes can win you the “nice” label. And yet we put huge amounts of value on that label. “Nice” young men can avoid rape convictions even when the jury admits they think they forced sex – because the jury can’t see that forcing sex makes a person not nice, ... READ MORE
- Extroversion privilege: (This post has a definite US slant, simply because that’s the only country whose culture I’ve experienced firsthand. I suspect it’s different elsewhere – feel free to comment.) This all started from a comment made by DNi on my post, Personal Privilege List. I started thinking about it, then some stuff happened, then I thought some more, and then I reached a conclusion: yes, there is a definite privilege extended to extroverts for no good reason. First, a definition session since people ... READ MORE
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